And now for everyone's enjoyment for however long i allow this post to stay up: the drunken 7am post after working the entire night at curve. #1-i apologize for typos, i've been drinking and i haven't slept yet. #2-this post will probably deleted when sober-non-exhausted me reads it, but whatever.
it's been a fun week. asa is here visiting and so i've kinda been showing him around. i went golfing today and remember how much i suck even though i enjoy golfing just for the fact that it's like an excuse to be outside. i love being outside. the wind in my hair, on my face, and the sun and treens and such. gah it's lovely.
working at the bar was entertaining. it actually went by pretty fast considering that i was there for 8 and a half hours.
i shouldn't write about any of this, but i'm an idiot. i honestly think i'm incapapble of actually liking someone becasue i'm stubborn. i'm in the wrong country for it and i'm pretty sure it would never happen anyways (the failing is on my end)for some reason i think it's holding me back but i cant let it go. then there's the whole thing here. i actually wasn't bothered nearly as much as i thought i'd be, but walking home in the daylight and knowing that i was going home to be alone was actully kinda weird which was sad. wonder if that makes sense. i wonder what could be. if anything ever could be. i guess you could say i'm not interested, but i am. i'd love to know what would happen if something were to exist. but i'll prolly find out. anne leaves in a week. what am i gonna do? it'll be me and boss-man at the bar, and just me here. not a good situation for the hopes i've got for myself. and then there's gordie. wish i knew him better, but tht may come to pass and we'll see how that goes. i'm still relatively undecided on that issue at the moment. fuck i'm hungry and tired and my feet hurt. this must be how nurses feel. been standing for the last 9 hours and haven't eaten. oh well...i'm too fat anyways. fuck i'm tire.d i know i've got more on my mind, but i'm supposed to wake up in and hour and half so i should probably get some sleep. g'night/g'mornin
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