hahahaha....just had to walk back from work at the gym in the pouring rain! It was wet, but not raining when i left this morning, so I had no rain gear with me. It's not windy for once, so most people had umbrellas out and I was just walking down the street getting completely soaked. I'm sure I was quite the sight. Prolly made it even funnier that I had a HUGE grin on my face the whole way home. Smiling is so fun! I only have to go to that stupid gym at 5am 2 more times!! I also keep smiling because of something that happened in the middle of the night last night. Hilarious text. That's about all I can say bout that, but I just keep almost randomly laughing out loud over it.
Anyways, I hate insomnia. I haven't had a decent nights sleep since last wednesday i think. Thursday I just couldn't sleep til real late, Friday I think I got to bed around 2:30am, Saturday around 5:30am, Sunday I was in bed around 1:30, but i dont think i fell asleep til about 3 or maybe even 4am (and i got up at 5am). Last night I was in bed at 12:30, read til 1 to try and make myself more tired, then I tossed and turned til about 3am (got up at 5am). I'm getting kinda tired of it, though I s'pose I could just resign myself to having a really weird sleep schedule and become nocturnal or something. I look so tired. I hate when I look tired cuz it really really wears on the self-esteem that I've been working so hard to have. I hate walking down the street knowing that I have huge bags under my eyes.
On the self-esteem thing. I really have been feeling so much better about myself. I'm not really sure why, maybe it's the change of scene, or maybe it's the fact that I don't feel like I'm always being shunned by everyone I walk by. Maybe it's working in the bar, who knows. All I know is that I like it a lot!
damn it's raining hard! seems more like winter now...OOOOOH!!!! thunder!!!!!! yay!!!!
ya know, i think i might even be able to get shit done around the house with the rain outside! the key feature is for me NOT to lie down. which is why i'm gonna put on a random movie out here in the living room and clean the crap out of this room. i can see the rain!! yay!
making chocolate self-saucing pudding!!